Why Am I in France?

Today in my French class we had a really interesting discussion about the future that turned into discussions about language and culture and assimilation. It came up in conversation that I was a huge fan of music in Spanish (iTunes Latino ALL DAY ERRY DAY). My teacher asked if I spoke Spanish, and I explained that I had studied it for four years but had been speaking it for almost my entire life. "Pour quoi tu es en France?!" "Pour le Festival." "Ah, d'accord. C'est une question stupide."

Much more than her asking me a stupid question, I had given her a stupid answer. I didn't mean to give that answer. It's not correct. I chose France because of the Festival. I am in France for a whole lot more than that.

A lot of people and our teachers think the sole reason anyone comes to Cannes is to work at the Festival, and for nothing more. Like we clap our hands over our ears and go "LALALALALA NOT ABSORBING ANYTHING ABOUT FRANCE LALALA" for 3 months until the Festival starts. Obviously this is not the case, and it's very sad to be thought of that way, and it is from my frustration and wish that I had expressed myself better in class today that I write this blog post. I hope it serves as a better explanation for why I'm here than my idiotic 9AM durrrrr-for-the-festival?-response.

I chose to study abroad because I wanted to have an adventure, to go somewhere where they didn't speak English, where it would be a challenge, where it would be beautiful and fun. Why I chose Cannes over, say, Madrid or Barcelona or somewhere in South America WAS because of the Festival, because obviously it held an opportunity far more relevant to my area of study than anywhere else. Also I love Europe, and I'd been to Cannes before and knew it was a place I enjoyed. I knew it was beautiful and safe there and on the sea, warm and remote and restful. I have difficulty with large cities for an extended period of time, I find it very overwhelming, thus Cannes was an obvious choice.

That is why I came to Cannes. It fit my needs for a study abroad location perfectly. Why not learn French? Almost all of my close friends at home speak it, I used to take French lessons and was good at pronunciation, it was something I wanted to do. French is beautiful and romantic! And I'm smart enough to learn another language. Why not? I'll never be as good as some of my friends, but I'm pretty good at it. I worked at it hard to be able to come here and I continue to work at it hard. When I came here I balked at the amount of time we spent learning French, but now it's just part of the routine. Practicing, always, 3 hours a day. You come to the College to learn French and that is what you have to do to live in Cannes. I enjoy it now. I enjoy French. I enjoy the challenge. I enjoy this skill that I've acquired and can continue to use as my life progresses, if for nothing else than to stimulate my mind.

It is true that I have no desire to permanently live in France, but that in no way means I don't care about it or feel a connection to it or appreciate it. A girl in my class brought up the notion of how working in the cinema leads to a life of traveling, and that she liked the idea of living somewhere new for 3 months out of every year. I agree with that wholeheartedly. That is a life I would be content with. Having a home base, somewhere permanent to go back to, preferably in California, which in my opinion is one of the best damn places on Earth to live, but then also traveling extensively with your productions. Maybe even to France! Where you can use all that French you learned at the College! Obviously I'll be back. Especially when my films are opening the Festival in a few years and winning the Palm d'Or. Just kidding. Not really.


The moral of this story is, I didn't just come to France to work at the Festival. That was a supremely wonderful added bonus to this location. I came abroad to have an adventure. I chose Cannes out of all the other places to have adventures because of the Festival and it's location and climate. The adventure includes learning another language, visiting places, having fun, making new friends, new connections, the challenge of survival alone in a foreign culture. That is why I came here, why I chose here, and what I'm getting out of being here. I hope no one for a second thinks that I don't appreciate being here or don't realize the opportunity I've been given. I came to France to study abroad in France, which I did, and am doing, and it has been a marvelous hot mess of an experience.

I couldn't ask for anything more.